The Thing Speaks for Whatever

Archive for June, 2010|Monthly archive page

That Time True Blood Made Me Safeword

In Katie, True Blood on June 29, 2010 at 12:12 am

Welcome to my home, you guys! And by “my home” I mean “this blog post where I talk about True Blood a lot” and by “talk about True Blood a lot” I mean “mostly think about how Sookie and Eric should have sex like, yesterday (instead of going to Jackson) while typing some rambly bullshit” and by “Sookie and Eric” I mean “Eric and Katie”*.

So anyway. True Blood. I’m not going to recap for you, because, well, too lazy. But I will cast judgment on all of the characters, because it is what I do best!** Read the rest of this entry »


The Birth of a Nation? or, WTF, NYT? (part 1)

In Rooks, Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. on June 28, 2010 at 10:21 pm

If you hadn’t heard that Noah Feldman, Harvard ConLaw professor, recently wrote a completely flabbergasting OpEd for the New York Times, allow me to break the bad news.  Noah Feldman, Harvard ConLaw professor recently wro – you know what?  Screw it.  Remember Roger Ebert’s review of North?  No?  Because that’s a completely ridiculous thing to remember?*  Fair enough.  You should know, then, that it (in)famously contained the lines:

North” is one of the most unpleasant, contrived, artificial, cloying experiences I’ve had at the movies. To call it manipulative would be inaccurate; it has an ambition to manipulate, but fails.


I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would like it. Hated the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it.

Sub in ‘Noah Feldman’s completely flabbergasting article’ for ‘North’ and you’ve basically got the tenor of how I feel about this piece.  Read the rest of this entry »

What a way to go?

In Polls Hypos and Other Imaginings, Rooks on June 27, 2010 at 5:11 pm

So this dude in Utah was just excuted by firing squad.  Now, various positions on the death penalty aside, I’m pretty sure everyone can agree that, on a scale of zero to incredibly fucking painful, no method of execution is anywhere near what anyone would call “pleasant.” At first, when I initially read that the deceased actually chose firing squad, I thought that was a bit wackadoo.  By all accounts bullets hurt quite a bit – having never been shot, I can’t attest to any personal experience, but that seems to be a pretty universal assessment.  Bullets = Hurt like a mofo. Read the rest of this entry »

On making lemonade or, Nothing sucks quite like accountability.

In Uncategorized on June 11, 2010 at 11:24 am

I had a blog, once.  It was a fun lil’ thing, oft neglected, but I loved it for awhile.

Eventually I felt like it was getting too personal, and decided to shut the fucker down.  (This may or may not be a theme in my life.  Whoops?)

But that blog was not only good times (at times), it made me feel accountable.  Not to any extensive imagined readership, though I had a few, but to writing something interesting, reading and seeking out interesting things, and to thinking out loud about life, the universe, and you get the point.  I think I need that gentle kick-in-the-pants back.  I need some motivation.  I need some place where I can feel accountable without feeling stifled.  Maybe other people need such a place too.  Hence, a new blog, fresh and unspoilt, for me to obsess over. Read the rest of this entry »