The Thing Speaks for Whatever

Tags, Elaborated: “Team Being on Teams”

In Jenny, Katie, Rikka, Rooks, So . . . about this blog . . ., This verges on the ridiculous, Vanessa on October 6, 2010 at 12:08 am

In anticipation of an upcoming book post of epic proportions, it seemed like a good time to revel in metabloginess, to wit, a Res Ipsa Etc. eMeeting that developed into an extended riff on one of our favorite tags here at RIE, namely the ever popular “Team Being on Teams.” Conveniently, it might also create some small anticipation in our readers in regards to our first ever group post.  Yes, a Group Post. All five (5) lady-identified ladies on ONE SCREEN.*  OMG, etc.  Conveniently, the same email chain also explains how group posts will likely work, and outlines the topic of the first such post.  It’s like, supermeta, yo.**

*Unlike say, this post.  In which we are all present.  Uh, whoops?
**Portions of this exchange not relevant to the outcome have been omitted.

Rooks: Hey fellow blogladies! So I realized the other day that I’m the only one of us who knows all of us, if that makes sense, and thought it would be good to remedy that at least a little, but wasn’t sure how.  Then I had an idea that would hopefully be interesting, moderately fun times, and help us get to know each other, and by extension, help anyone who reads the blog get a sense of the five (5) wonderful but very different people who write.  I mean, we can’t all be Team Vanessa, after all.  And even then, since two of you don’t know Vanessa and she doesn’t know y’all, the joke isn’t as good.  Lame.  The idea would also have the benefit of prompting writing, but only something reasonably short – say, a paragraph or two, or even a witty one-to-two-liner – and without having to scrounge for a topic.

So what’s the idea?  Roughly weekly, someone’ll make a draft, unpublished blog post centered around a non-invasive, from the sense of one’s personal life, theme or question.  […]  Then, on our own time, but say, within a week or so, we each edit the post with our response, […] and publish the thing.  What do y’all think?  Katie graciously volunteered to help come up with prompts, where volunteered = was conscripted, and we inadvertently stumbled onto a good one the other day, since we’re all readers here – “Books you never finished (and don’t intend to).”  (And why, or what not finishing means, or any other number of places that could take you.)  I’m expecting Rikka to pipe up any moment now and say she’s finished every book she’s ever read, but why that is could be just as interesting.

Katie: Approve.

Jenny: I’m down.

Vanessa: I like the sound of it! Heart you guys! Everyone be on my team!

Rikka: I’ll be on Team Vanessa, fuck it. I need a team. Also, I am pretty sure I have finished every book I’ve ever read. I think it’s some weird form of OCD. I can write about ones I regret reading or something. Like Twilight. I will never be the same.

Rooks: Well, Rikka, you’re certainly not Team Katie now.

Katie: Just FYI, Team Katie is a fun team. I make bars.

Rikka: Katie has a team? Well, damn. I will join pretty much any team that is not Team Middle Aged Women Lust After High School Boys. Also, I like bars.

Jenny: What team has cuter uniforms? That’s really going to be the decider for me. (hint: I look good in jewel tones.)

Vanessa: My team is generally about dresses and Katie’s is generally about shoes. But if we’re talking colors, I dibs purple?

Katie: Just FYI, I haven’t worn pants to work in going on 6 weeks. So if dresses persuade you, Team Vanessa isn’t your only option. But she is pretty much always the cutest ever, so I might lose. I think I pick green, though. Or maybe blue. But I think green. Sketches forthcoming. [Eds. Note: There were no sketches.] Also, we only lust after boys who are out of high school.

Rooks: Umm, clearly my team would have the cutest uniforms, had I a team, colors not withstanding; I want that to be clear, dammit.  And Rikka, Team Katie totally watches Twilight movies on the reg.  She won’t tell you that, but they do.

Katie: Why don’t you want anyone to be on my team, Rooks? WHY? Anyway, it’s not a requirement. It just happens now and then. If there’s nothing good on Lifetime and Dr. Quinn isn’t on. We don’t even have t-shirts.

Rikka: Not convincing me here, Katie. Shoes, Twilight, Lifetime movies, Dr. Quinn? Also, green? Green clashes with my hair, and blue makes me look like a US flag. I don’t know. Maybe if there is some team event like Chocolate Truffle Tuesday I could get into…


Dear Vanessa,

I don’t know you but I am on your team. I cannot be on a team where I could be forced to ever watch a full minute, let alone a full episode, of Dr. Quinn.

Love, Jenny

Dear Katie,

You make really good frosting, but you like really really sucky things. Twilight? Do you know how much sex, real sex, is in most YA novels? Why not go that route? Not even jewel tones can make up for Twilight.

Love, Jenny



Why don’t we make a team? One that doesn’t suck. Or only sucks in a good way.

<3 – Rikka

Vanessa: Guys, is it lame if I just want us to be one big happy team? Dresses with pockets, jewel tones, frosting, gin and tonics, young adult sex, cute shoes? I guess that doesn’t solve the problem of who we are versus (Anyone? Bueller? It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia fans?).  Perhaps we are finding the focus of our blog after all! Oh, yeah, I guess feminism and stuff, too. WHATEVS.

Katie: Thanks, Rooks, for making this about picking teams instead of all being Team Our Differences Are Beautiful, Now Let’s Eat Frosting. THANKS A LOT. I make no apologies for my interest in bad television/cinema, but I will state, in my defense, that I turned off the Kitt Kittredge American Girl movie after only 5 minutes last night.

Rikka: I want to be on Team Our Differences Are Beautiful, Now Let’s Eat Frosting, but instead, can I have caramels? I hate frosting. Or can it be cream cheese frosting?


Rooks: Except for the Gin and Tonics (booze more generally would be ok), I maintain that is Team Me, Vanessa.  HA.  YOU’RE ALL ON TEAM ROOKS, SUCKAS!  Ahem, uhh, I mean, Team ODaBnLEF, or, umm, wait, no frosting, umm, Team ODB for short.


So, Katie, what’s your defense for buying and shipping me the Kitt Kitridge American Girl movie, hmm?  Hmmmmmmmmmmm?

Katie: It was really funny and only cost $4.98? Anyway, I make killer cream cheese frosting (you can ask my roommate) and also I like caramels and I’d make Jenny buttercream special.

[three months later]

Rooks: Holy shit – 12 million years later, Rikka actually made the book post.  Go forth and blog!

Surely you didn’t think we’d actually mention Team Being on Teams explicitly?  Look for the Group Post: Books We Never Finished Edition in the coming days!

  1. I’m totally on Team Vanessa. But only because I knew her first.

  2. Hmmmm…but you’re all (OK, I don’t know all of you, but the ones of you I have met set such a high standard that I have to assume that you all reach that strata) so pretty and have such fun things/likes/cooking skills/dressing abilities… to recommend you, how could one choose?!
    Having said that, I must choose Rooks or she might not continue to agree to stand in my wedding :)

  3. 1. Katie still has my duvet cover. She probably smeared cream cheese frosting all over it.

    2. I wish you guys stuck with Team ODB. Seriously. You know why.

    • Because you like it raw?

    • Well, Bezlkjaljawe;lkj;a, if you’d picked it up the first time I sent it this wouldn’t be a problem. Going to the post office is hard. I usually just give my mail to my secretary, but there are customs forms and all that bullshit involved.

      Anyway, the cat needs a bed.

  4. But who versus?

  5. […] is, naturally, in the eye of the reader.  Oh, and it should be noted that, in the true spirit of Team ODB Being on Teams, we don’t all agree on which books are shite and/or not worth the time and […]

  6. […] case of “Glee,” that would be presumptive/reasonably expressed sexual orientation, gender, and Team ODB quotient (we’re all the same because we’re all different!  Hearts!  Skidoosh!) – but […]

  7. […] case of “Glee,” that would be presumptive/reasonably expressed sexual orientation, gender, and Team ODB quotient (we’re all the same because we’re all different!  Hearts!  Skidoosh!) – but […]

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