The Thing Speaks for Whatever

Posts Tagged ‘Elephants’

The First Amendment Says I Have to Write This Post and Other Little-Known Constitutional Penumbrae

In Katie, Legally Inclined, Polls Hypos and Other Imaginings, This verges on the ridiculous on October 25, 2010 at 12:17 pm

Denizens of the internet (you’re all from the United States, right? This becomes important really soon), I would like to introduce you to the most useful and important acronym you will ever know. No, not SCUBA. Not LASER. FAS.

FAS stands for First Amendment Says, and can be employed any time someone tramples your First Amendment rights. Picture this: you’re minding your own business, exercising your First Amendment rights like any good American, and then suddenly they’re trampled! It’s as if a herd of elephants stampeded over the original copy of the Constitution that, if my vague memories of National Treasure are correct, is kept in the Library of Congress when someone isn’t gallivanting about the country with it finding lots of treasure! National treasure.

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